Those his antics are always hilarious, some of the things Frank does are so disturbing they can be hard to watch. So whats up with that 4% of people who claim to have chopped their dookie with a poop knife (or something similar)? [3] On January 15th, the post was uploaded to the blog pizzabottle,[4] which also included comments of people saying they too were familiar with the concept of poop knives (shown below). Think of it as an insurance policy against a clogged toilet. It's hard to say where he gets his ideas, but once he decides he wants to do something, there's no deterring him from that path. Adam. Well, the good news is that you can get Updated Aspiring chefs who are getting around to learning more about Japanese knives will appreciate how they can improve your overall culinary skills. View our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'knifepulse_com-leader-1','ezslot_7',171,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-knifepulse_com-leader-1-0');Many families with such issues have their ways of dealing with the problem or owns custom poop knives. Its sort of like an extra long kitchen knife. The mystery leads to a vast conspiracy in which every member of the group is suspected as having taken part in the pooping. So yes, we shared our poop knife.". Its listed as dishwasher safe, although we dont recommend mixing up your kitchen cutlery with your bathroom cutlery. With the cans of cat food and the weird food sex stuff with Artemis, it's pretty clear that Frank does not have a healthy diet. But some people are repulsed by the idea of bringing cutlery anywhere near the can. Not designed for opening Amazon packages. However, with the modernized bathrooms with advanced flushing water systems, these toilets can handle even such big poops. due to big poops? Ask this Reddit user. Long enough to keep your hand clear of danger in a standard depth toilet. 'r' Great for anyone in your life that you want to show you care while also making them feel slightly uncomfortable! Frank often brings up his traumatic time in Vietnam. She will be getting her own utility knife now. subscribers . My mom would throw them out and then he would replace them. 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It is right to say that everyone has a unique story to tell about their pooping experiences, but the good news is that you can now handle the issue of giant poops with a poop knife, which is more hygienic and convenient to use. yahoo. When he was 22, he took a large poop at a friend's apartment and asked for a poop knife, leading to his embarrassment. It turns out that she did not know what a poop knife was and had been using the old rusty knife hanging in the utility closet as a basic utility knife. My family poops big. My friend was the local dealer and always had guests over, because you cant buy weed without sitting on your ass and sampling it for an hour. Msg & data rates may apply. You can change your preferences any time in your Privacy Settings. A guano glaive? A Dung divider? Metal reinforced silicone is strong, hygenic, easy to clean, and dishwasher safe (if you dare). [3] The Chive Guy reveals bizarre story of how he grew up using a Poop Knife, [4] Pizza Bottle Apparently A Lot Of People Have Poop Knives And Theyre Worse Than You Think, [5] Buzzfeed I Just Learned What A Poop Knife Is And I Refuse To Suffer Alone, [6] Imgur Apparently Imgur likes poop knives, here's some poop knife inspired work I did instead of actual work because I have the flu, [7] Cheezburger Guy's Humiliating Story About What A Poop Knife Is Leaves Internet In Tears. Made with a strong metal core that's surrounded with hygienic silicone for easy slicing and cleaning ,the poop knife will allow you to be a samurai to your poo-poo platter. The poop knife measures 9.8 inches long, and has a handle on one end, and a soft blade on the other end of it for slicing your dung. But, dear readers, the most astonishing part of this tale is not just that a family had a specially designated knife for cutting up their own excrement. Then lots of people start laughing. Colin McCormick is a Senior Writer with Screen Rant and has been a proud member of the team since 2019. Something for everyone interested in hair, makeup, style, and body positivity. The average stool length is about four inches, so aim for pieces around that size. As you can imagine a poop knife is going to be infested withyou guessed itpoo. home? Ever heard of one of these? One minute you're just happily going about your day, without a care in the world (if you ignore your kids and your spouse and your job and also the actual world), the next day you pop online and you read a story about a poop knife. Poop Knife XL The Original / funny / gift/ toilet / joke / gag / meme 5 out of 5 stars (88) $ 26.00. More posts from r/IASIP. These images were later compiled in a post by Cheezburger.[6]. Please sit back, relax and enjoy. But more importantly, it introduced mega-poopers to a tool that helped them salvage their plumbing systems. Read the full story here. Gather round, kids, for I have a story that might make you rue the rosy-fingered dawn that brought you into this day. And trust us, youre going to be so, so glad that it did. Endlessly spinning poops will mock you from the toilet vortex no more! Just be sure not to confuse which side is which before using. Thanks to LearnedButts brave testimony, people in the comments felt empowered to share their own experiences using poop knives. For instance, a particular member of the family discloses how they had been accustomed to the use of a pee jar and Tupperware, a habit they had learned from their dad. If anyone has laid a mega-poop, you know that sometimes it won't flush. While he loves to find interesting projects in any kind of genre, he has a special movie of crime stories that are infused with a little dark humor much like the work of his favorite author, Elmore Leonard. It is a legit tool while in its use, and therefore it is good to let you know. Long enough to keep your hand clear of danger in a standard depth toilet Hilarious packaging Poop Knife ships free within the US! He also recognizes that while maturing into fixed on the wall of one of their laundry room, and it was only dedicated for Ever drop a deuce so massive that you look down and wonder: Will this log of crap clog my toilet? THIS WEBSITE USES COOKIES TO ENSURE YOU GET THE BEST EXPERIENCE. Digital Archaeologist & Treasurer & Media Maid, Digital Archaeologist & Treasurer & Collection Butler. I need to use it. He would put stray cats in the soup to add some meat to it. As someone who has always laid down girthy solid monsters. If anyone has laid a mega-poop, you know that sometimes it won't flush. Imagine a heavy silicone-covered butter knife. As you can imagine, the internet has invented a plethora of slang terms for the poop knife: fecal cleaver, dung divider, guano glaive, the list goes on. One of the greatest mysteries faced by the gang of Paddy's Pub was discovering who pooped the bed. Like most weird/insane/gross things, the poop knife became public knowledgeand fodder for public discussiondue to a Reddit thread in which the user LearnedButt shared a troubling experience he'd recently had at a friend's house in which he asked to use the . All I know is that we didn't. Poop knives are standard protocol in some houses across America. Hey op. Loo confusion seems to be a relatively common occurrence just look at the story of the man who didnt use the loo seat for years because he thought they were only reserved for women. In order to get a good night's sleep over the sounds of dozens of cats outside their window, Charlie and Frank have devised the perfect system. MORE : Donald Trumps ex-wife Ivana says he isnt racist but says things which are silly, MORE : Couples perfect holiday snap ends in disaster and a broken leg, Sign up to our guide to whats on in London, trusted reviews, brilliant offers and competitions. Its best to hang your poop knife within arms reach of the toilet for easy access. Self care and ideas to help you live a healthier, happier life. Fear notyou can prepare your feces for flushing with a handy tool called a poop knife. However, a poop This users family is just one of the many families that have embraced the use of a custom poop knife. Those partners may have their own information theyve collected about you. Sweet Dee is the secret weapon of the Paddy's Pub gang on It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. As the gang investigates how this could happen between two grown men, more and more poops begin appearing in the bed. The poop knife measures 9.8 inches long, and has a handle on one end, and a soft blade on the other end of it for slicing your dung. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Maybe it's genetic, maybe it's our diet, but everyone births giant logs of crap. Your turd lands sideways over the drain and wont go down, no matter how many times you flush, Your toilet has weak water pressure so your poop needs a little help going down. Be a samurai of the poo poo platter! helping cut the big chunks of poop. POOP. A poop knife doesnt have to be an actual knife, per se. FML.. Obviously he has one, but maybe he calls it by a more delicate name. Even with modern advances in flushing technology, some turds are simply too huge to make it down the drain without the risk of plumbing problems. Oh, and the user added that the poop knife was in the laundry room and not the bathroom because "we only had one poop knife, and the laundry room was central to all three bathrooms.". It is for this very reason that a poop knife comes in to help us split the poop apart hence easing the flushing process. He arrives and I ask him for his poop knife. Poop knives arent standard bathroom appliances by any means. Thankfully she didnt cook with it, but used it to open Amazon boxes. fact that their laundry room was at the center of the three bathrooms; hence it Not only would that probably taste awful, but the fact that they are eating a giant piece of meat that has been in the sun all day is not healthy. It also turns out that none of them had poop knives, it was just my fucked up family with their fucked up bowels. 2.25, 2.50 comments sorted by Best Top New Controversial Q&A Add a Comment . For more information, please see our She was the token female and a soft voice of reason that no one listened to. [2] Reddit Guy and his friends marvel over his unflushable turd. It was almost like someone was launching an ICBM turd from the toilet. Read our Cookie Policy. However, there was an issue with their poop knife since it had already started to erode just like the ordinary kitchen knife. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'knifepulse_com-banner-1','ezslot_2',169,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-knifepulse_com-banner-1-0');Although it may sound funny to those learning about it for the first time, this knife has been in usage for a couple of years since the original product usage spread like fire through the popular Reddit conversation. Become a Poopetrator! These are just some of her funniest quotes! Though Frank seems to have no problem living a disgusting lifestyle, he apparently becomes a bit of a germaphobe once there is a risk of illness. Anyway, there it is! would make it easy to access by one since it was the only designated knife for The story doesn't stop there, and I hate everything: That's pretty gross, right? RELATED:It's Always Sunny: 10 Funniest Schemes The Gang Took Too Far, Ranked. Buzzfeed covered the story on the 16th. So in some ways its probably a good thing that we have the internet. After failing to seduce his ex-sister-in-law, Frank decides to go for an even more depraved relationship and begins hooking up with his ex-sister-in-law's adult daughter, Gail. They even have a specific knife used exclusively for cleaning their filthy toes. Accordingly, it needs to be washed after every use. Comedy Frank and Charlie find someone has pooped in their bed, leading Mac and Dennis to join them as they attempt to find the culprit. It was normal to walk through the hallway and have someone call out hey, can you get me the poop knife? The wood on the poop knife was dark and smooth after years of use. As horrible as the rest of the gang are, even they are disgusted by the way Frank and Charlie choose to live. I have phone sex with my secret 'lover' most days am I cheating on my husband? [Light] I was 22 years old when I learned that not every family has a poop knife. Along with movies, Colin stays up-to-date on the latest must-see TV shows. A Dung divider? Instead of flushing and hoping for the best, a poop knife breaks down the dookie into chunks your toilet can handle. A Reddit user who goes by the name LearnedButt shared that his family usually takes a huge dump which makes it difficult to flush. It was an old rusty kitchen knife that hung on a nail in the laundry room, only to be used for that purpose. Cookies and similar technologies are used to improve your experience, to do things like: Without these technologies, things like personalized recommendations, your account preferences, or localisation may not work correctly. A guano glaive? Note it is used after the bowel movement rather than during the act. Isnt it beautiful? When he was 22, he took a large poop at a friend's apartment and asked for a poop knife, leading to his embarrassment. Do those logs sometimes need a little help going down? In the story, the user tells about his family takes large poops, and had a knife dedicated for breaking up those poops when they wouldn't flush. Growing up, this was a common enough occurrence that our family had a poop knife. Whichever the reasons, everyone in the family poops big chunks, and this was an apparent reason to use a poop knife to help flush the toilet quickly.